This essay is for my sister and brother Democrats. Everyone else is welcome to read it, and I’m sure some of my Republican friends will enjoy a laugh. But don’t miss the last paragraph. We’re Democrats, we will beat each other up for a while. But then, we’ll get to work.
Denial
November 6, 2024 was more than just the day after election day. For Democrats, it was a return of a nightmare, a nightmare that came to a blessed end in the middle of a pandemic four years before. But on that Wednesday, we were right back in it. It was even worse, knowing almost exactly how the nightmare would play out. We had knowledge aforethought, like the dream where the car is about to go off of the cliff, but there’s nothing you can do about it.
For the next two and a half months, we could pretend it wouldn’t happen. Deep down in our subconscious we were in the first stage of grief, denial. We kept thinking that some terribly dramatic action would occur, and somehow we could avoid the reality of what our Nation was about to do. It was like lying on the gurney, waiting for the operation. Perhaps, if you just got up and walked away, the problem would end, and there would be no need for anesthesia or the scalpel or the shocking pain of recovery.
Anger
Now, four months into the Trump Administration, we are in the depths of the nightmare. And denial is past. We are in the “anger” stage of grieving for our Nation. And, my fellow Democrats, in our complete inability to stop the Project 2025 juggernaut, we have turned anger onto ourselves.
At first it was just the usual “Monday morning quarterbacking” of the Harris Campaign. The “Campaign of Joy” immediately was criticized for letting the Trump craziness “off the hook”. Instead, the Harris team focused on the joy they offered the Nation. But this Nation seemed to look more to blame someone rather than be uplifted.
And then Democrats complained about the lack of unifying leadership, as if having lost the Presidency and the Senate, there should be an “automatic” fallback leader. There’s not. While the future of the Democratic Party remains bright, with many brilliant Presidential possibilities, and new young leadership in the Party itself; it’s tough to lead when there’s no “power” to exercise. What do we expect Hakeem Jeffries to do with a House minority? What actions should the “candidates”; Newsom, Whitmer, Buttigieg, Moore, Murphy, Klobuchar, Beshear, Shapiro, Booker, and others, take?
More Anger
Next the old Bernie Sanders versus Hillary Clinton rivalry somehow came back. If only, some said, we had “given” Bernie the nomination in 2016, we would have avoided the entire nightmare of Trumpism. It’s the “autocrats” of the Democratic Party, the Clintons and Obamas and their old staffers, who pushed first Hillary and then Joe Biden down “unwilling” Democratic throats. That rewriting of recent history gained impetus with the huge crowds Bernie and AOC drew to rallies across the country.
And most recently, we’ve spent days gnashing our teeth about whether Joe Biden failed us, by getting old. CNN’s Jake Tapper has found his fifteen minutes of fame and fortune, building a “conspiracy” of Biden staffers hiding infirmity. But the reality was that nothing was hidden. We saw Biden have good days and bad days in public. I watched the 2024 State of the Union address, the one that was good enough that MAGA-world claimed that Biden must be drugged. And I agonized through the June Debate, where Biden clearly was exhausted before he entered the room. There were no secrets, no conspiracy. He was both good, and bad, and the evaluation was that it was time for him to go. The leaders of the Democratic establishment, with the blessings of Pelosi and Obama, made it happen. What was hidden?
Bargaining
So Democrats are angry. And some have started bargaining: bring back Bernie (or AOC), dump all of the old Democrats in office (David Hogg on the DNC), throw out all of the “Washington Political Class”. Change in the Democratic Party is inevitable. There a place for the energy of AOC and Sanders, and for the youth vote the David Hogg represents. They need to have a place on the bus, but they probably shouldn’t be driving.
Our deal has to be with the American people, not with each other. We need to find the tools to reach out to the millions of Americans who decided to sit out the 2024 election, and truly believed that wasn’t a “difference” between the candidates. I bet their seeing the difference now.
Depression and Acceptance
Depression is next. It’s still seventeen months before we can even begin to curb Project 2025 and the MAGA Presidency, November of 2026 until we can change the makeup of the US House and Senate. That’s a long time to be stuck in “our long national nightmare”. Gerald Ford had no idea.
But like last night’s nightmare, there is always a “morning after”. Democrats should spend the next year organizing, fighting all we can against the injustices of the Trump dictatorship by executive order, and assuring that when the time comes, we are ready. We will continue to struggle with our own internal issues, after all, we are Democrats. Our Party is known best for heading in a dozen directions at a time. But “acceptance” is knowing that we will need unity of purpose to reach “the morning after”. We can self-flagellate for a time more. But then we need to get to work. This nightmare will not end itself, it requires all of us to wake-up and join together.
The sooner we reach acceptance, the sooner we can begin.

