Smokin’

This is a part of the “Sunday Story” series – even though it’s not Sunday. No politics today – just a story about “smoking”!!!

Thanksgiving

It’s the week after Thanksgiving – and just now I’m smoking a turkey;  well, sort of.  This year Jenn and I decided to not “do” Thanksgiving.  Instead, we met my sister and her husband at Cooper’s Hawk, a restaurant in nearby Columbus, to enjoy their Thanksgiving feast.  It was a great dinner, with great company, great food, and great wine; all for a great price. And no dishes to clean-up afterwards!  

But, when you have a smoker, sooner or later you’ve just gotta smoke.  And so today, December 5th, a Thursday, I’m smoking a turkey breast.  Sooner or later, they’ll be mashed potatoes and gravy, dressing and green beans – a full Thanksgiving repast for just the two of us.  Why a Thursday in December?  Because we’re retired, and we have a day at home, and the turkey is defrosted.   Why not?

Turkey Challenge

But smoking a turkey breast is always a challenge (as is the full bird, way too much food for just the two of us).  I can smoke baby back ribs (my best thing), spiral sliced ham (really good too), chuck roast (good – needed to stay in longer), and even chicken (a whole chicken is good, but chicken wings and pieces aren’t my favorite).  I’ve even been a part of a whole brisket (shared with the neighbor, who gets up at 3 am for work anyway – it takes over 12 hours).  That was delicious.

I’ve also tried pork chops (too big to eat), pork tenderloin (really good), and even salmon (I liked it, but the rest of the family thought it had a “weird texture”).  Anyway, one of the best things I grill is salmon –so why mess it up?  And then there’s steaks and tenderloins, also really, really good on the grill.  I know what I like, and I like those grilled and medium rare – not smoked.

Windchill 

But turkey always gets within ten degrees of being done (165), and then stops.  I leave it in an extra hour, and still it’s holding at 153, not budging an inch (or a degree).  So for the past couple of turkeys, it’s been 30 more minutes in the 1929 Magic Chef Restaurant class oven at 350 degrees, the centerpiece of our kitchen.  (Remember that advertisement on TV, where the lady asks an architect to design a house around a faucet?  Jenn designed our open kitchen/dining room around that cast iron stove that took seven boys and two grown men to get into the house!!!). 

Part of the challenge with turkey, is I’m always smoking it in the winter.  Today, it’s 22 degrees with a 22 mph wind, making the windchill 7.  It’s cold, and while the smoker doesn’t “feel” windchill, it’s still a stand-alone smoker sitting in the middle of the sundeck in the side yard.  In the past, I’ve found smoking in sub-10 degree weather didn’t work out – the smoker couldn’t hold temperature, and we had to bring that ham in to finish in the Magic Chef.  It ended up dried out.  But this is a new smoker, and it’s not quite as cold as that first Arctic day.  So I’m hoping we get solid heat.  So far, it’s been on for three hours and holding the 260 degrees needed to get the turkey done.

Flavor and Patience

As far as flavor is concerned – I like hickory smoke for ribs and beef, and apple smoke for ham,  turkey and chicken.  I’ve tried hickory with everything and like it fine, but apple is less overwhelming.  And I’ve put everything from Guinness beer to apple vinegar in the “steam”, but water works just fine with turkey.  If it smokes for four hours, it still comes up tender and juicy.  (Oh, and one more trick for turkey – injections!!! I inject Zatarain’s turkey marinade several places into the bird.  The flavoring is good, but the juiciness is awesome.  No “chewy” white meat in this turkey!!).

It’s supposed to take 3 ½ to 4 hours.  But my smoking experience is like that famous line from the old Charlton Heston movie about Michelangelo, The Agony and the Ecstasy.   The Pope (Rex Harrison) comes into the Sistine Chapel and asks Michelangelo (Heston) busy painting the “Creation” when he would be done. The artist grumbles, “When I am finished”.   The turkey is done at 165 degrees.  When will that be?  When it’s finished.  Or when I can’t wait anymore – and the Magic Chef can finish the job.  It’ll still be great!!!!

Post Script

So the turkey breast stayed in the smoker for over five hours – and “stalled” at 154 degrees. It took another 25 minutes in the Magic Chef to get to 165, but it was well worth it. Tasty, smoky, juicy — and enough leftovers for sandwiches and even another dinner in the near future!!!

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Author: Marty Dahlman

I'm Marty Dahlman. After forty years of teaching and coaching track and cross country, I've finally retired!!! I've also spent a lot of time in politics, working campaigns from local school elections to Presidential campaigns.

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