{"id":7884,"date":"2025-05-28T09:09:42","date_gmt":"2025-05-28T13:09:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dahlman.online\/?p=7884"},"modified":"2025-05-28T09:09:45","modified_gmt":"2025-05-28T13:09:45","slug":"stages-of-grief","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dahlman.online\/index.php\/2025\/05\/28\/stages-of-grief\/","title":{"rendered":"Stages of Grief"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>This essay is for my sister and brother Democrats.\u00a0\u00a0Everyone else is welcome to read it, and I\u2019m sure some of my Republican friends will enjoy a laugh.\u00a0\u00a0But don\u2019t miss the last paragraph. We\u2019re Democrats, we will beat each other up for a while.\u00a0\u00a0But then, we\u2019ll get to work.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Denial<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">November 6, 2024 was more than just the day after election day.\u00a0\u00a0For Democrats, it was a return of a nightmare, a nightmare that came to a blessed end in the middle of a pandemic four years before.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0But on that Wednesday, we were right back in it.\u00a0\u00a0It was even worse, knowing almost exactly how the nightmare would play out.\u00a0\u00a0We had knowledge aforethought, like the dream where the car is about to go off of the cliff, but there\u2019s nothing you can do about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For the next two and a half months, we could pretend it wouldn\u2019t happen.\u00a0\u00a0Deep down in our subconscious we were in the first stage of grief, denial.\u00a0\u00a0We kept thinking that some terribly dramatic action would occur, and somehow we could avoid the reality of what our Nation was about to do.\u00a0\u00a0It was like lying on the gurney, waiting for the operation.\u00a0\u00a0Perhaps, if you just got up and walked away, the problem would end, and there would be no need for anesthesia or the scalpel or the shocking pain of recovery.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Anger<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now, four months into the Trump Administration, we are in the depths of the nightmare.\u00a0\u00a0And denial is past.\u00a0\u00a0We are in the \u201canger\u201d stage of grieving for our Nation.\u00a0\u00a0And, my fellow Democrats, in our complete inability to stop the Project 2025 juggernaut, we have turned anger onto ourselves.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">At first it was just the usual \u201cMonday morning quarterbacking\u201d of the Harris Campaign.\u00a0\u00a0The \u201cCampaign of Joy\u201d immediately was criticized for letting the Trump craziness \u201coff the hook\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0Instead, the Harris team focused on the joy they offered the Nation.\u00a0\u00a0But this Nation seemed to\u00a0\u00a0look more to blame someone rather than  be uplifted.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And then Democrats complained about the lack of unifying leadership, as if having lost the Presidency and the Senate, there should be an \u201cautomatic\u201d fallback leader.\u00a0\u00a0There\u2019s not.\u00a0\u00a0While the future of the Democratic Party remains bright, with many brilliant Presidential possibilities, and new young leadership in the Party itself; it\u2019s tough to lead when there\u2019s no \u201cpower\u201d to exercise.\u00a0\u00a0What do we expect Hakeem Jeffries to do with a House minority?\u00a0\u00a0What actions should the \u201ccandidates\u201d; Newsom, Whitmer, Buttigieg, Moore, Murphy, Klobuchar, Beshear, Shapiro, Booker, and others, take?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">More Anger<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Next the old Bernie Sanders versus Hillary Clinton rivalry somehow came back.\u00a0\u00a0If only, some said, we had \u201cgiven\u201d Bernie the nomination in 2016, we would have avoided the entire nightmare of Trumpism.\u00a0\u00a0It\u2019s the \u201cautocrats\u201d of the Democratic Party, the Clintons and Obamas and their old staffers, who pushed first Hillary and then Joe Biden down \u201cunwilling\u201d Democratic throats.\u00a0\u00a0That rewriting of recent history gained impetus with the huge crowds Bernie and AOC drew to rallies across the country.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And most recently, we\u2019ve spent days gnashing our teeth about whether Joe Biden failed us, by getting old.\u00a0CNN\u2019s Jake Tapper has found his fifteen minutes of fame and fortune, building a \u201cconspiracy\u201d of Biden staffers hiding infirmity.\u00a0\u00a0But the reality was that nothing was hidden.\u00a0\u00a0We saw Biden have good days and bad days in public.\u00a0\u00a0I watched the 2024 State of the Union address, the one that was good enough that MAGA-world claimed that Biden must be drugged.\u00a0\u00a0And I agonized through the June Debate, where Biden clearly was exhausted before he entered the room.\u00a0\u00a0There were no secrets, no conspiracy.\u00a0\u00a0He was both good, and bad, and the evaluation was that it was time for him to go.\u00a0\u00a0The leaders of the Democratic establishment, with the blessings of Pelosi and Obama, made it happen.\u00a0\u00a0What was hidden?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Bargaining<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So Democrats are angry.\u00a0\u00a0And some have started bargaining:\u00a0\u00a0bring back Bernie (or AOC), dump all of the old Democrats in office (David Hogg on the DNC),\u00a0\u00a0throw out all of the \u201cWashington Political Class\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0Change in the Democratic Party is inevitable.\u00a0\u00a0There a place for the energy of AOC and Sanders, and for the youth vote the David Hogg represents.\u00a0\u00a0They need to have a place on the bus, but they probably shouldn\u2019t be driving.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Our deal has to be with the American people, not with each other.\u00a0\u00a0We need to find the tools to reach out to the millions of Americans who decided to sit out the 2024 election, and truly believed that wasn\u2019t a \u201cdifference\u201d between the candidates.\u00a0\u00a0I bet their seeing the difference now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Depression and Acceptance&nbsp;<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Depression is next.\u00a0\u00a0It\u2019s still seventeen months before we can even begin to curb Project 2025 and the MAGA Presidency, November of 2026 until we can change the makeup of the US House and Senate.\u00a0\u00a0That\u2019s a long time to be stuck in \u201cour long national nightmare\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0Gerald Ford had no idea.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But like last night\u2019s nightmare, there is always a \u201cmorning after\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0Democrats should spend the next year organizing, fighting all we can against the injustices of the Trump dictatorship by executive order, and assuring that when the time comes, we are ready.\u00a0\u00a0We will\u00a0\u00a0continue to struggle with our own internal issues, after all, we are Democrats.\u00a0\u00a0Our Party is known best for heading in a dozen directions at a time.\u00a0\u00a0But \u201cacceptance\u201d is knowing that we will need unity of purpose to reach \u201cthe morning after\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0We can self-flagellate for a time more.\u00a0\u00a0But then we need to get to work.\u00a0\u00a0This nightmare will not end itself, it requires all of us to wake-up and join together.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The sooner we reach acceptance, the sooner we can begin.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This essay is for my sister and brother Democrats.\u00a0\u00a0Everyone else is welcome to read it, and I\u2019m sure some of my Republican friends will enjoy a laugh.\u00a0\u00a0But don\u2019t miss the last paragraph. We\u2019re Democrats, we will beat each other up for a while.\u00a0\u00a0But then, we\u2019ll get to work. Denial November 6, 2024 was more than &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/dahlman.online\/index.php\/2025\/05\/28\/stages-of-grief\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Stages of Grief&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7884","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Stages of Grief : Our America - Essays on Politics and American Life<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dahlman.online\/index.php\/2025\/05\/28\/stages-of-grief\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Stages of Grief : Our America - Essays on Politics and American Life\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This essay is for my sister and brother Democrats.\u00a0\u00a0Everyone else is welcome to read it, and I\u2019m sure some of my Republican friends will enjoy a laugh.\u00a0\u00a0But don\u2019t miss the last paragraph. We\u2019re Democrats, we will beat each other up for a while.\u00a0\u00a0But then, we\u2019ll get to work. 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